Bastard's Notebook

So once-upon-a-time (it might have been last night) this pretty pretty princess (it might have been me) accidentally sat in something safety orange and sticky. It seemed like it could have been frosting so this nice man who likes to be helpful, and who quite reasonably assumes that any nearby mess that happens to be safety orange might be his fault (it might have been Marc17) tasted it - on purpose! - to figure out what it was. After tasting it a couple times to be sure that it was not only disgusting, but also not sweet, he declared it to be acrylic paint. Hilarity ensued.