(no subject)

[winneganfake]

I already asked this of tjk_40, but I'll ask it of the rest of you as well. If I should get hunted down and slaughtered by the Christian Zealotry League, who among you would revive my lifeless corpse? Who would bring me back from the threshold to continue my dark work upon this earth? Who here knows the rites and the circles, much less has direct access to a quantum field re-stabilizer?  WHO WOULD DO WHAT IS NEEDFUL TO THE CHICKEN??

 Would you?

Comments

[darkmane.livejournal.com]

Bring you back from the dead? So you can terrorize Christians?

Hell yeah... and I would set it up so they thought you were being lifted bodily into Heaven... you know, so they would know your Godliness and in 2000 years people would curse your name too!

[winneganfake.livejournal.com]

Excellent!

[kadath.livejournal.com]

I'm too squeamish. Ask Ann.

[winneganfake.livejournal.com]

Last I remember, chickens are outside of her contract.

[inaurolillium.livejournal.com]

I would not reanimate your corpse, but I would call up your vengeful ghost. I would dig the trough, and fill it with meal and with honey and with the blood of sheep, and I would keep off the other shades until you had drunk your fill, and I would work the secret spells known to the witches of the isles, to let your shade have enough shape and substance to grip the knife, and then I would set you lose upon them for a year and a day.
Reanimated corpses are gross.

[winneganfake.livejournal.com]

Y'know, this works for me.

[inaurolillium.livejournal.com]

It damn well better. Bleeding the sheep is a lot more difficult than bleeding the chicken.

[winneganfake.livejournal.com]

That really depends on what kind of chicken we're talking about here. In my case, as I recall, this requires one of the Great NorthUmbrian Chickens. Measures about twelve feet tall at the shoulder-spines.

[inaurolillium.livejournal.com]

Then I'm definitely sticking with the sheep. They don't even need to be the genetically modified man-eating New Zealand kind.

[the-tall-man.livejournal.com]

Teach me the rites, baby. I'm all over it.

[winneganfake.livejournal.com]

Ok, take one whole chicken, rub with paprika, oregano, lemon pepper and a small pinch of sage, then place in a 400 degree oven in a mix of soy sauce, honey and.... wait a second.

[the-tall-man.livejournal.com]

Whaddaya mean, wait?

Oven's getting warm! What next?

[winneganfake.livejournal.com]

Well, I couldn't tell if the next line was "a shot of whiskey," or "the blood of your slain enemies." Use your best judgment, I guess. Roast for two hours.

[jemstone.livejournal.com]

Ahahaha...

You presume to think that I have not already enacted certain... shall we say... precautions against your demise?

Silly, silly man.

The way you cling to the thought of mortality amuses me.

[mahariel.livejournal.com]

don't know the rites, but I'll help with the chicken

[cynickal.livejournal.com]

Arise, CHICKEN!

[lilibat.livejournal.com]

I grew up in the buckle of the bible belt, I have been prepared for this for quite some time.

[jgreywolf.livejournal.com]

Sorry - sounds like too much work. I am just way too lazy.