(no subject)

[winneganfake]

Jesus H Christ on a pogo stick!

There's the better part of a colony of wasps hanging out on my porch right now. they must have been attracted by the porch light, and they're staring thanks to what little warmth seeps out from the door and the window that lead onto the porch. But they're staying there right now, hanging around the light sources, smoking cigarettes, trash-talking the spiders, prepping themselves for stinging the unwary, and constantly staring at me with their solid black, multifaceted, orbs of pure hatred and malice. This so-called-illusion is not helped by the fact that I am both slightly phobic and beesting-allergic when it comes to the little fuckers.

Sadly, we currently lack any anti-wasp weaponry in our home arsenal, but that will not last for long, especially if this continues- tonight, homemade traps. Tomorrow, should those fail, chemical warfare. Those fuckers are messing with an artist that uses large quantites of spray-on shellac, not to mention other wonderful toxic substances. Bastards are going down.

Comments

Chemical Warfare...

[sajah-al-zarqa.livejournal.com]

is copletely not neccessary. From multiple experiences (100% of the times it was done) I can attest that all you need is diluted dish soap (especially if there's a nest). You can use it in a spray bottle, but my mom always put hot/warm water in a cooking pot with the liquid dish soap mixed in and went outside (our front porch), tossed the water up onto the nest. Any and all wasps, bees, etc. immediately fell dead, the babies died, and any returning ones would die when they landed on the soapy watered nest or surrounding area.
So if you don't have a nest you could just thouroughly spray the area with soapy water about once every three days and that should solve the problem. I would be highly interested in knowing if doesn't work.

Re: Chemical Warfare...

[winneganfake.livejournal.com]

Necessary, no. Cathartic, fun, and utterly, ruthlessly, thorough? YES. Oh much with the yesness.

I look at it this way. Nature has created, in the form of the wasp, yellow-jacket, and other subspecies, a beastie that serves zero purpose on the food chain- it has no natural predators, it does not pollinate or serve other useful methods. It does in fact, do nothing but eat, breed, and HATE. Not to mention stinging the unwary. In short, they're identical to humans. Only smaller. And flying. And armored. And again with the stingers.

As our only potential competitors on the evolutionary market, I am sure of one thing- the must be EXPUNGED. And I will make that happen, or if need be die in the process. Only, my hatred for these wee lil' fuckers is strong enough that, well, to paraphrase a well loved comic... "And when my tainted spirit finds its destination, I will topple the master of that dark place. From my black throne, I will lash together a machine of bone and blood, and fueled by my hatred for you this fear engine will bore a hole between this world and that one. When it begins, they will hear the sound of children screaming - as though from a great distance. A smoking orb of nothing will grow above the porch, and from it will emerge a thousand starving crows. As I slip through the widening maw in my new form, they will catch only a glimpse of my radiance before they are incinerated. Then, as tears of bubbling pitch stream down my face, my dark work will begin. I will open one of my six mouths, and I will sing the song....." you get the idea.

As for environmental impact, well, this is my porch. Where I use high-CFC fixative sprays, apply barge adhesive, and work regularly with substances too toxic to use inside the apartment. Not to mention where I smoke. The environment's been impacted like mad (if you can impact a small valley of concrete) already. a can of bug spray ain't mgoing to add much damage.

Re: Chemical Warfare...

[sajah-al-zarqa.livejournal.com]

I agree that they must be expunged. Chemicals or not, I was just saving you a trip to the store and giving you an "immediate" solution to the problem. So you could do the soap thing first, then go get the chemicals of war..... Just thinking of the "must die right now" aspect of it for you :)